WHY SALLY WHY?

The more I am around S...y the more jittery I get, I don't know what it is but I find myself repeating what I say as though I don't have the confidence of words and I find that I am beginning to stutter a lot when I am talking with her. She asked me what was the matter with me last night at the (LESBIAN HOUSE DINING -in-wimmin-only-space), I lied and said nothing that I thought that maybe I was just tired. She said to me that she thought I needed a change of atmosphere or scenery and that she thought I needed to develop another set of wimmin friends, she went on to tell me that she did not think that most of the wimmin who came to the meetings were really my friends and that they just didn't have anywhere else to go where they could be so trendy and kinky, I told her that I thought that was a pretty snap judgement to make when she had only seen or been around the wimmin that one night. She said something that I found to be very interesting quote "when you live homeless and on the streets you have to be able to make judgements very quickly because most of the times it is not the judgement that saved your ass but the quickness in which you act on those judgements," she went on to say that what she told me was what she saw and she knew that I would not like what she had to say. She said that my worry over the fire was my way of not dealing with the reality of not having told the wimmin that she was living in the backyard in the tree, and that I feared losing their friendship so much that she knew if it were necessary she would be the one who would be asked to move. I did not deny anything, nor did I admit to anything. She asked me if I enjoyed the fire last night and if I enjoyed the wimmin who came out to the fire and joined us. I had given no thought to the other wimmin around the fire and I let her know that I really did enjoy the fire. She told me that of the fifty wimmin who were there I should become selective about who or rather which ones of them I really trusted and liked and to find out which one of them trusted or liked me. She also said that G..... the womon who owned THE HOUSE was one of the wimmin who had a great respect for me. I laughed at that one and said I don't think so, she responded with time will show you. She said the heavy set womon ( I knew she was talking about D....the womon who said she was addicted to eating meat) she is the most sincere womon in the group however she is very much in need of a lot of attention and caring for, and if I did not intend to give her a lot of attention I should not make an attempt to establish a friendship with her. I asked her if she would build another fire, she did.